When people talk, it can be easy to let your mind go astray and not let what they’re saying truly sink in. It’s so easy to be elsewhere, and so very difficult to be present. Being present means giving someone your full attention when it would be just as convenient to go over your mental to-do list. It’s active listening, instead of passive listening. It’s the hallmark of a leader.
When you listen to what other people say, they are more apt to not only listen to you, but also more prepared to accept what you say. Listening well is the building block of any relationship, and relationships are the cornerstone of all business. Just ask April.
April is meeting with one of her employees again, and for her this is the same old situation: Mary has a problem and she’s going to vent about it for a little bit before storming off and then, by tomorrow, it will all magically be in the past. It feels like the fourth time this week that Mary has had this conversation with April, and April is just eager for it to be over and done with.
This time, Mary sits down with her and expresses her problems with a new employee to April, and the situation for Mary is very problematic: A new employee has been saying some off-handed things to her that make her feel very uncomfortable. It’s making her feel unsafe.
Mary can tell right away that April couldn’t possibly care less, and Mary gets the feeling that April isn’t really listening to her and is just waiting for her to finish speaking. April rushes to the end of the conversation and haphazardly tells Mary she will “look into it,” and this is certainly not the answer that Mary was looking for.
When pressed for an explanation, April realized that she truly didn’t listen to her, and as Mary gets more and more frustrated, she realized that she made a mistake: not only did she invalidated the feelings of an employee by not listening to them, but she also put herself at risk as a business owner for almost overlooking a truly problematic situation at her business.
After apologizing, April took the time to listen to all of Mary’s concerns and, after taking swift action to insure her employee felt safe, worked hard to build a sense of confidence when it comes to communication in her business.